So, you all know a lot about me by now, but, I'm not sure you know too much about Ashley. Well, let me fill you in...
I first met Ashley during the December holidays last year (2011). We met over the phone during a conversation that was mediated by our Intended Parent Coordinator at Reproductive Possibilities. Now, I don't think there is any "right way" to manage the nervousness such a phone call can induce. Let's be honest here - George and I were trying to see if this was the woman we would choose to care for our baby the same way we would, and, Ashley was trying to see if we were a couple she felt she would want to help by taking on a very, very hefty responsibility. Think about it this way - would you be willing to endure a ton of hormone injections that make you feel horrible only to be followed up with getting pregnant...with another couple's baby?! If you can, imagine the icky feeling of morning sickness combined with a slew of side effects from hormone injections, all in the name of giving somebody else a baby. Takes a warrior, doesn't it?
 |
| Ashley, Benjamin, and me the day they flew home after our transfer. Yes, I know my jugs are on full display. |
Now, before George and I met Ashley through our agency, we tried matching with a surrogate independently. First of all, we thought this would save us some money. Secondly, we thought this would give us the opportunity to get to know a potential surrogate better. Well, both of these reasons turned out to be wrong and wrong. For instance, one surrogate told us she wanted to carry our baby so she could use the money she earned to build a porch onto her house. Really? Another sounded good...until we learned she was on disability and trying to earn extra cash. Independent matching? Complete failure.
So, during that first phone call, George and I knew instantly that Ashley was the woman we wanted to carry our baby. She agreed with us that we are all God's children, and, she was on the "will not abort list" just like George and I were. We were also finishing each others sentences during that first phone call, and, we quickly realized Ashley was a strong woman who wouldn't take anybody's crap. Sound like anybody you know? ;)-
 |
| Ashley bought and gave me this sign for good luck the day before our transfer. It now rests on my nightstand where it will remain until I design our baby's nursery. |
George and I have grown to love Ashley and her family, and, we want you to know just how awesome Ashley is. There are way too many amazing things about her to list in one post, but, I'm giving it my best shot.
First of all, Ashley is an amazing wife and mother. She is the glue that holds her family together, and, she rocks it out. I've met her husband and her son, and, watching her parent her son in person was awesome - she's raising happy, respectful children. When Ashley and her son went back home after our transfer, I cried, George didn't want to put his booster seat back in the shed, and, even the kids said the house wasn't the same without them. Thankfully, Ashley has started to use FaceTime so we get to see her kids because we love them so much!
Next, there is the reason why Ashley is doing this. She's never discussed money with me...EVER. Instead, she told me she simply wants to help someone, and, I wholeheartedly believe her. She has been put through the ringer medically, and, her schedule is disrupted at least once a week with doctor's appointments...all to help US. Really, I don't know how she does it. In addition to running her family, she also manages a busy hotel in her home town!
The night before my egg retrieval, I burst into tears out of fear that my egg retrieval would not give us the results we wanted. Who sat next to me and comforted me? Ashley. When I cried because I felt like I was a failure to George due to my lack of a uterus, who comforted me? Ashley again. During our transfer, when George and I sat in the operating crying (happy and scared tears), Ashley remained calm and her facial expression said it all - she KNEW this was going to work, and, she KNEW she was experiencing a miracle.
Simply put, Ashley is considered a miracle to our family. She has sacrificed time with her family, time at work, and her body to give US a baby. For weeks she's been injecting herself with hormones that make her body feel pregnant...when she already is. She's been so sick that she has to take prescription nausea medication to give US a baby. And you know what? She never complains...EVER. She's become an honorary member of our family. Nobody takes this amazing gift she's giving us for granted. We all know she is making our dreams come true, and, we will probably never be able to tell her how truly grateful we are. She's giving us a miracle, and, there simply are no words for that. All we can do is promise to be kick ass parents to our baby, and, remain great friends...whether Ashley likes it or not, she's stuck with us, and, there is no finer lady I'd want to care for our baby for nine months. Ashley, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!
xoxo
No comments:
Post a Comment